God Bless The Broken Road

Once I decided to give online dating a go, a serious go, I couldn’t shake a feeling. It was a feeling I shared with two close friends: I sensed that my happily ever after was not coming from this source. 

After almost a year trying to navigate that strange world, I discovered I was right. Today I deleted all my profiles. 

Turns out my missing puzzle piece was not lurking on some hook up site. Real life brought him to me. 

Moments turned into hours, hours turned into days, days into weeks and weeks into months. Hundreds of “me too” and nodding of heads. 

Building and discovering connections and passions. Sharing of hopes and dreams and past heartaches. 

Moments of doubt but ultimately letting those go and learning to fly. 

Every decision, every event leading up to now has brought me to the place I am, to be in the right place and at the right time to find this person who is so right for me and the person I am now.  

I don’t kid myself to think it’s going to be easy. But nothing worth having rarely is. I’m older and wiser and know the value of something real. What I have found and what we have is real. And magic. 

The road behind us is rocky and broken. However I wouldn’t change a single turn, twist or pothole. It brought us to each other and that makes it blessed. 

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3 thoughts on “God Bless The Broken Road

  1. Back in August, I finally made my breakup with my girlfriend of nearly three years public (it had been over since May). My sister, bless her heart, soon messaged me, singing praises of some lady: “So in all seriousness, if you ever want to check out an awesome lady, my friend, Jenna is amazing… No harm in a long distance Facebook friend…” My first response to my sister after a quick browse of Jenna’s profile on facebook: “What am I , 20 years older than Jenna?”
    I went ahead and accepted the suggested friend add. Made our first contact over an article on grief. I was impressed with her insight, intelligence, and her ability to communicate clearly (a skill that needs improvement in me). Once in a rare while we’d chat briefly here and there, with real life always rearing its ugly head and interrupting everything.

    I would love to pinpoint when something grew with me and her… pretty sure if I read over every message we exchanged I could find it (and maybe print the transcript and hang it on my wall, right next to a place reserved for one special email).

    Fast forward to this last Saturday. Sometime that morning I felt something. I won’t call it completeness, for i was complete to begin with. In fact I felt complete before meeting her (can’t pinpoint when that finally happened, but it was a first in my life. I had always defined myself by who i was in a relationship with, but recently discovered I could be complete just as me). I felt a sensation of fullness (maybe?). I was complete before, but now I had much much more. I knew I was in love. Been there before (or so I believe) but not feeling like this. I was itching all day to tell her, but had that silly little fear.. ol’ Mr Scare-her-away kept yanking on an ear. Well that night I told him to go piss up a rope and told her. Damn glad I did. She deserved to know exactly what I was thinking and feeling.

    God Bless The Broken Road indeed… it has been a long hard road. One I have tried to learn from, and I’d say for the most part I have succeeded.

    I’m not going to “go public” on Facebook just yet. My kids need to hear from me (unlike three years ago) just what has changed in my life. Things got rough in this arena before, so i’m playing things cautious for now.

    To all of Jenna’s friends: she has endlessly sung your praises, and I look forward to meeting all of you.

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  2. Let the celebrating begin. We love Jenna very much and want nothing more in the world for her to be treated like she so deserves. Her happiness means so much to us. Both those girls are true gems and are a gift in everyone’s world they touch.

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